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OBSESSION dvd commentary
Wednesday, May 19th, 2021 12:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hyojungssOBSESSION (wonhan, 3.9k) - playlist link
1. Obsession - EXO
very self explanatory, rest of the song doesn't really apply but it's just about this obsession with someone else that consumes your life.
2. Los Ageless - St. Vincent
i love this progression. here it's about jeonghan being this enigmatic, impossible to contain person who can't be "had" and then once someone has the illusion of that possession (ie. wonwoo being in a r/s with him) if they break up it's their folly for not trying harder to retain him in all of that glory. then given the first two things happened, of course you would lose your mind! you let him slip through your fingers, basically. this is what jww goes through during the course of the story.
3. When Am I Gonna Lose You - Local Natives
the difference between belief and faith: trying to tell apart what it means to really trust and know someone
the archangel imagery: yoon cheonsa... i really love the imagery of this song and its feel. if i felt like writing more then maybe i would have written a road trip that follows the lyrics, and i think that would be a good place for wonu to actually experience jeonghan more fully and not just in the bits of time they steal away while on campus, and come to realize that he both really lvs him and also is terrified of him in a way that really does not allow for actual trust and faith because its coming from a place of adoration/idolization
4. Hard Feelings/Loveless - Lorde
basically just denial that a relationship is coming to an end + not using healthy communication methods
5. tolerate it - Taylor Swift
the genius description: "This song is about the continuous struggle of wanting love from someone who isn’t even paying attention to anything you do for them." wonwoo is a very observant character and very 'in his head' about things; jeonghan is literally "so much older and wiser" to him even though the gap between is likely less than a year, or one grade level. it's about the perception and also is more emphasized because of the hierarchical system in skr and the fact that wonwoo's behavior is, relative to other members of svt, a lot more subservient to that? i think hwa was the one that i really internalized wonwoo = hierarchy from but i don't remember where this came up first. the point is that he naturally takes a more "older brother", reliable or stern role towards younger members and acts cuter to older members. thus here it is extrapolated that he subconsciously gravitates towards someone who he feels knows what they're doing and can make up for all the things that he doesn't know, even if in reality yjh is just as immature as he is. likewise he ends up admiring joshua and trying to gain his respect, even though it doesn't really mean anything.
wonwoo in this story gets these ideas and just thinks about them, and doesn't act on them until necessary. it means that he doesn't know how jeonghan actually feels he only speculates on it. but at the same time jeonghan's behaviors are indicative of his feelings and wonwoo is just hanging on to the chance of being wrong. jeonghan can't love wonwoo the way that wonwoo wants to be loved. and yet wonwoo still wants someone like jeonghan to love him.
6. Me & My Dog - boygenius
again with wonwoo feeling like jeonghan makes him a better person or whatever because of his senior influence. better person, cooler person, whole person - these are kind of interchangeable, the exact feeling is never specified in the story because i don't think these things can be separated from each other completely. this is the post breakup stage where wonwoo's trying to cope with losing jh and is doing even worse than he expected to because he's a loser. jk but seriously he's going through it.
i actually wrote the ending of this fic before i read the lyrics of this song but they ended up matching so well - again jww is a 'dreamer' (see: knowing bros l&r episode) who 'thinks' more than he 'does'. reality is just not as kind as fantasy.
7. The Scientist - Coldplay
this is strictly what wonwoo wants jeonghan to feel and to say to him at the end. he wants jeonghan to admit fault so that he can believe the breakup wasn't his own fault, or the fault of their incompatibility. wonwoo also wants to be valued which is why he wants to be told he is loved + important to someone. (but as you can see with the ksy plotline he's blinded by his obsessions.) wonwoo wants jeonghan to suddenly realize that ww is who he was looking for all along - ww is not totally in denial he knows that jh did not feel that way before, but it's that sudden lightbulb switch on that he wants so badly. jh skipping what is probably a gen chem class partially because jww is there... yeah. jww not being able to concentrate on the science at all....... yeah. ww at least wants jh to be SAD about it and he doesn't even know if jh is. ww is certainly kind of destroyed by it.
as i imply later with the sweet potato irony, jun probably liked ww and ww was oblivious/tried to ignore those affections bc he didnt know how to deal with them LOL like what was i saying... jun was dropping hints but like in a proactive way where if you really liked someone and wanted to put yourself forward you would and you still wouldn't be overstepping on the other person if they didn't like you back. you respect their choice in the end but at least you were trying, u know? to get closer to them? and try to confess to them? and ww just did not like, give jun the same respect back. super callous. jun you are valid ♡
anyone still bitter ww was rumored to lead gangnam beauty but plds allegedly made him turn it down. jokes on you i watched it anyway for cha eunwoo and it SUCKED, but i think that gives me the right to easter egg this. wonwoo would be a good supporting character actor. he doesn't even have to be good to get roles but he'd be decent ok!!! did you know that my friends parents are in love with cha eunwoo and my dad knows who he is because of some random drama?? i doubt my parents know the name of a single member of seventeen
again this is because i believe jww is literally the type to look up to people who are older than him or in a position of authority. but also interesting point
jeonghan was actually the one that said this about ww irl lmao... after jun dropped seokmin's apron to help wonwoo put his on. i think a fan on personality database said that ww generally is less attentive to his own physical needs which is why other people do stuff for him a lot
juxtaposition between this and wonwoo not giving a fck when the attention was bothering ksy (/ljh to a lesser extent but i didnt even mention that in the fic). if u read my tweets u may notice that this was not an intentional discrepancy but it is now! <3 again like ww just agreeing with jh because he thinks jh knows everything
that last line is word for word from the fact music awards inse episode where yjh pretended to give out jww's bank info lmao...
what can i say.... this is not really seeding only because i never saw nayoung and joshua as compatible but now that i've written this out i think it would be a fun idea. like i think josh's type is american etc but if he's in kr why not date. putting nayoung in here was self indulgent (and indeed i love to write her with jeonghan).
i dont have anything to add about joshua that i didnt say in the tolerate it section above but this was intentional discrepancy </3 also in this section wonwoo does not audibly refer to jeonghan by name, and he doesn't in the whole fic. this was because of like.... reverence... LOL. and i thought it would be weird to have ww call jeonghan sunbae if they were in a r/s but i wasn't really sure about all that so i just kept it out
fun call back to the poker game, though this is a perfectly normal usage of the term. i kind of wanted to write more of the gambling because that too was a symbol of the relationship (eg. failing even though they're working together, or going all in on a relationship idk something like that) but it would have been more effort than it was worth to research enough to write it accurately.
you know what we can have the ksy introvert vs extrovert argument all day and i still won't make a decision on which one he is
see this
this fic went through a series of titles: tolerate it > chekhov's gun > leave us in ruins > OBSESSION and honestly i loved the idea of jun becoming important after being an intro character, the gingko tree coming back etc but in the end i like a title to fully represent the work and obsession did that the best lmao. also i was really conscious of the fact that this is a JUKEBOX fest and i claimed a song and none of my title choices were from the scientist but life is like that. i added this line after changing the title because i wanted to retain that sense of intention in my choices being in the reader's awareness
i think i built up well to this moment... throughout the story you had seen the easy way that they talk to each other, so much so that ww doesn't rly put effort into being careful about his words. and now you can see this sliver of a reveal about how ksy values jww's opinion and also wants to feel valued by him but jww is completely unable to pick up on that
i went for this really picturesque scene with jun and jh, from a distance so u can't hear what is being said at all but you can see the actions, they're so obvious if you're watching. this is of course jh just being kind/motherly towards jun but it's such a stark difference from how it feels like jh treats ww. jh isn't mean to ww he's just not sickeningly nice like this... bc as u see later, it doesn't feel as much like ww needs it even tho he wants it lol. also i was deciding between "taste of iron" and taste of irony and i think it's just so good this way it's like a double meaning
idt that jh said this unprompted. i think that ww managed to express his concerns finally. but i think ww just projects a mature vibe despite being a baby about a lot of things
in general for all of jeonghan's interesting relationships within svt, and all of wonwoo's, the one they have together irl is kind of bare. neither is obsessed with the other or anything, neither makes exceptions for the other, and neither is particularly attentive to the other nor do they have visible history. not to say they never interact but ya LOL remember when yjh posted a picture of their empty kkt chat together. but this is just from what i've observed and i've def missed things before. point is that i do not think they're very compatible
this is just my fav line i really like how all gingko tree leaves fall on the same day and how this represents the end of that part of the cycle/end of the season i guess coinciding with the end of their relationship
ty for reading!! i wrote most of this on 4/20/21 because i could not wait to talk about it... and then i edited it a lot in the time since then but i was too lazy to update the quotations here LOL.
THE PLAYLIST
1. Obsession - EXO
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
I want you I want you want you
very self explanatory, rest of the song doesn't really apply but it's just about this obsession with someone else that consumes your life.
2. Los Ageless - St. Vincent
How can anybody have you?
How can anybody have you and lose you?
How can anybody have you and lose you
And not lose their mind, too?
I try to tell you I love you and it comes out all sick
How can anybody have you and lose you?
How can anybody have you and lose you
And not lose their mind, too?
I try to tell you I love you and it comes out all sick
i love this progression. here it's about jeonghan being this enigmatic, impossible to contain person who can't be "had" and then once someone has the illusion of that possession (ie. wonwoo being in a r/s with him) if they break up it's their folly for not trying harder to retain him in all of that glory. then given the first two things happened, of course you would lose your mind! you let him slip through your fingers, basically. this is what jww goes through during the course of the story.
3. When Am I Gonna Lose You - Local Natives
Could I finally see
Between belief and faith?
When am I gonna lose you?
I remember the trees tumbling down
Like an archangel choir
And the ocean was all we could see
And I knew that I wanted you
Between belief and faith?
When am I gonna lose you?
I remember the trees tumbling down
Like an archangel choir
And the ocean was all we could see
And I knew that I wanted you
the difference between belief and faith: trying to tell apart what it means to really trust and know someone
the archangel imagery: yoon cheonsa... i really love the imagery of this song and its feel. if i felt like writing more then maybe i would have written a road trip that follows the lyrics, and i think that would be a good place for wonu to actually experience jeonghan more fully and not just in the bits of time they steal away while on campus, and come to realize that he both really lvs him and also is terrified of him in a way that really does not allow for actual trust and faith because its coming from a place of adoration/idolization
4. Hard Feelings/Loveless - Lorde
Please, could you be tender?
And I will sit close to you
Let's give it a minute before we admit that we're through
These days, we kiss and we keep busy
The waves come after midnight
Hard feelings
These are what they call hard feelings of love
L-O-V-E-L-E-S-S generation
All fuckin' with our lover's heads generation
And I will sit close to you
Let's give it a minute before we admit that we're through
These days, we kiss and we keep busy
The waves come after midnight
Hard feelings
These are what they call hard feelings of love
L-O-V-E-L-E-S-S generation
All fuckin' with our lover's heads generation
basically just denial that a relationship is coming to an end + not using healthy communication methods
5. tolerate it - Taylor Swift
I wake and watch you breathing with your eyes closed
I sit and watch you
I notice everything you do or don't do
You're so much older and wiser, and I
If it's all in my head, tell me now
Tell me I've got it wrong somehow
I know my love should be celebrated
But you tolerate it
I sit and watch you
I notice everything you do or don't do
You're so much older and wiser, and I
If it's all in my head, tell me now
Tell me I've got it wrong somehow
I know my love should be celebrated
But you tolerate it
the genius description: "This song is about the continuous struggle of wanting love from someone who isn’t even paying attention to anything you do for them." wonwoo is a very observant character and very 'in his head' about things; jeonghan is literally "so much older and wiser" to him even though the gap between is likely less than a year, or one grade level. it's about the perception and also is more emphasized because of the hierarchical system in skr and the fact that wonwoo's behavior is, relative to other members of svt, a lot more subservient to that? i think hwa was the one that i really internalized wonwoo = hierarchy from but i don't remember where this came up first. the point is that he naturally takes a more "older brother", reliable or stern role towards younger members and acts cuter to older members. thus here it is extrapolated that he subconsciously gravitates towards someone who he feels knows what they're doing and can make up for all the things that he doesn't know, even if in reality yjh is just as immature as he is. likewise he ends up admiring joshua and trying to gain his respect, even though it doesn't really mean anything.
wonwoo in this story gets these ideas and just thinks about them, and doesn't act on them until necessary. it means that he doesn't know how jeonghan actually feels he only speculates on it. but at the same time jeonghan's behaviors are indicative of his feelings and wonwoo is just hanging on to the chance of being wrong. jeonghan can't love wonwoo the way that wonwoo wants to be loved. and yet wonwoo still wants someone like jeonghan to love him.
6. Me & My Dog - boygenius
I had a fever
Until I met you
Now you make me cool
I never said I'd be all right
Just thought I could hold myself together
When I couldn't breathe, I went outside
Don't know why I thought it'd be any better
I'm fine now, it doesn't matter
I dream about it
And I wake up falling
Until I met you
Now you make me cool
I never said I'd be all right
Just thought I could hold myself together
When I couldn't breathe, I went outside
Don't know why I thought it'd be any better
I'm fine now, it doesn't matter
I dream about it
And I wake up falling
again with wonwoo feeling like jeonghan makes him a better person or whatever because of his senior influence. better person, cooler person, whole person - these are kind of interchangeable, the exact feeling is never specified in the story because i don't think these things can be separated from each other completely. this is the post breakup stage where wonwoo's trying to cope with losing jh and is doing even worse than he expected to because he's a loser. jk but seriously he's going through it.
i actually wrote the ending of this fic before i read the lyrics of this song but they ended up matching so well - again jww is a 'dreamer' (see: knowing bros l&r episode) who 'thinks' more than he 'does'. reality is just not as kind as fantasy.
7. The Scientist - Coldplay
Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart
Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
this is strictly what wonwoo wants jeonghan to feel and to say to him at the end. he wants jeonghan to admit fault so that he can believe the breakup wasn't his own fault, or the fault of their incompatibility. wonwoo also wants to be valued which is why he wants to be told he is loved + important to someone. (but as you can see with the ksy plotline he's blinded by his obsessions.) wonwoo wants jeonghan to suddenly realize that ww is who he was looking for all along - ww is not totally in denial he knows that jh did not feel that way before, but it's that sudden lightbulb switch on that he wants so badly. jh skipping what is probably a gen chem class partially because jww is there... yeah. jww not being able to concentrate on the science at all....... yeah. ww at least wants jh to be SAD about it and he doesn't even know if jh is. ww is certainly kind of destroyed by it.
LINE BY LINE
Humans have more vulnerable parts than you might think. Once Junhui kicked Wonwoo in the shin and it hurt so bad that he was gasping for air long after Junhui left.
as i imply later with the sweet potato irony, jun probably liked ww and ww was oblivious/tried to ignore those affections bc he didnt know how to deal with them LOL like what was i saying... jun was dropping hints but like in a proactive way where if you really liked someone and wanted to put yourself forward you would and you still wouldn't be overstepping on the other person if they didn't like you back. you respect their choice in the end but at least you were trying, u know? to get closer to them? and try to confess to them? and ww just did not like, give jun the same respect back. super callous. jun you are valid ♡
Soonyoung got so fed up with randoms fixating on Wonwoo whenever they walked into a room like it was an episode of Gangnam Beauty that he outright refused to talk to Wonwoo for three days.
anyone still bitter ww was rumored to lead gangnam beauty but plds allegedly made him turn it down. jokes on you i watched it anyway for cha eunwoo and it SUCKED, but i think that gives me the right to easter egg this. wonwoo would be a good supporting character actor. he doesn't even have to be good to get roles but he'd be decent ok!!! did you know that my friends parents are in love with cha eunwoo and my dad knows who he is because of some random drama?? i doubt my parents know the name of a single member of seventeen
“Well, you’re always looking up,” Soonyoung said, munching on a french fry. “Don’t you just get that vibe from him, Jihoon?”
again this is because i believe jww is literally the type to look up to people who are older than him or in a position of authority. but also interesting point
“You need someone to take care of you,” Jihoon said. Soonyoung murmured his agreement, having learned his lesson.
jeonghan was actually the one that said this about ww irl lmao... after jun dropped seokmin's apron to help wonwoo put his on. i think a fan on personality database said that ww generally is less attentive to his own physical needs which is why other people do stuff for him a lot
It just makes everything so complicated, Jeonghan said, and Wonwoo quickly agreed because he hated campus gossip and drama.
juxtaposition between this and wonwoo not giving a fck when the attention was bothering ksy (/ljh to a lesser extent but i didnt even mention that in the fic). if u read my tweets u may notice that this was not an intentional discrepancy but it is now! <3 again like ww just agreeing with jh because he thinks jh knows everything
“We’ll be a team,” he added, “so you know I’m not scamming you. What’s yours is mine, and what’s mine is yours.”
that last line is word for word from the fact music awards inse episode where yjh pretended to give out jww's bank info lmao...
“They’re not dating, are they?” he asked Jeonghan, who laughed at that for way too long.
“I’m not going to rule it out,” Jeonghan said, shrugging.
“I’m not going to rule it out,” Jeonghan said, shrugging.
what can i say.... this is not really seeding only because i never saw nayoung and joshua as compatible but now that i've written this out i think it would be a fun idea. like i think josh's type is american etc but if he's in kr why not date. putting nayoung in here was self indulgent (and indeed i love to write her with jeonghan).
“I was so right, you’re so soft on them,” he accused. “You’d never be that nice to me. I go to the gym all the time and you complain too much about having to wake up early.”
i dont have anything to add about joshua that i didnt say in the tolerate it section above but this was intentional discrepancy </3 also in this section wonwoo does not audibly refer to jeonghan by name, and he doesn't in the whole fic. this was because of like.... reverence... LOL. and i thought it would be weird to have ww call jeonghan sunbae if they were in a r/s but i wasn't really sure about all that so i just kept it out
“I know not to take you at face value,” Wonwoo said.
fun call back to the poker game, though this is a perfectly normal usage of the term. i kind of wanted to write more of the gambling because that too was a symbol of the relationship (eg. failing even though they're working together, or going all in on a relationship idk something like that) but it would have been more effort than it was worth to research enough to write it accurately.
“It’ll be great to get some fresh air,” Soonyoung rationalized, not realizing literally every other extrovert on campus had the same idea.
you know what we can have the ksy introvert vs extrovert argument all day and i still won't make a decision on which one he is
Despite the raging humidity he was still sporting an oversized jacket and Adidas pants.
see this
“Your...” He peeked at the top of Wonwoo’s notebook. “Chekhov’s gun essay can wait.” Wonwoo waved him off.
this fic went through a series of titles: tolerate it > chekhov's gun > leave us in ruins > OBSESSION and honestly i loved the idea of jun becoming important after being an intro character, the gingko tree coming back etc but in the end i like a title to fully represent the work and obsession did that the best lmao. also i was really conscious of the fact that this is a JUKEBOX fest and i claimed a song and none of my title choices were from the scientist but life is like that. i added this line after changing the title because i wanted to retain that sense of intention in my choices being in the reader's awareness
“I don’t think I could understand the philosophical things you say if I tried,” Soonyoung continued, but it looked like he was waiting to see if Wonwoo would agree or protest against it. You do understand me underneath it all, can’t you tell? Why else would I go to you to feel at ease? Something like that.
i think i built up well to this moment... throughout the story you had seen the easy way that they talk to each other, so much so that ww doesn't rly put effort into being careful about his words. and now you can see this sliver of a reveal about how ksy values jww's opinion and also wants to feel valued by him but jww is completely unable to pick up on that
“Jeonghan-sunbae is looking after him,” Soonyoung said, finally recognizing what Wonwoo was so captivated by.
“Yeah,” Wonwoo said. He could taste the irony in his mouth.
“Yeah,” Wonwoo said. He could taste the irony in his mouth.
i went for this really picturesque scene with jun and jh, from a distance so u can't hear what is being said at all but you can see the actions, they're so obvious if you're watching. this is of course jh just being kind/motherly towards jun but it's such a stark difference from how it feels like jh treats ww. jh isn't mean to ww he's just not sickeningly nice like this... bc as u see later, it doesn't feel as much like ww needs it even tho he wants it lol. also i was deciding between "taste of iron" and taste of irony and i think it's just so good this way it's like a double meaning
“I don’t actually think you need to be taken care of,” Jeonghan said, in a way that was both encouraging and disappointing. “You’re really very capable of knowing what you need.”
idt that jh said this unprompted. i think that ww managed to express his concerns finally. but i think ww just projects a mature vibe despite being a baby about a lot of things
“I wish,” Wonwoo said, staring at the white ceiling, “that I could be seen as I am.”
“I don’t know if we’re looking for the same thing,” Jeonghan said.
“I don’t know if we’re looking for the same thing,” Jeonghan said.
in general for all of jeonghan's interesting relationships within svt, and all of wonwoo's, the one they have together irl is kind of bare. neither is obsessed with the other or anything, neither makes exceptions for the other, and neither is particularly attentive to the other nor do they have visible history. not to say they never interact but ya LOL remember when yjh posted a picture of their empty kkt chat together. but this is just from what i've observed and i've def missed things before. point is that i do not think they're very compatible
>The gingko tree leaves fell the next day, all at once.
this is just my fav line i really like how all gingko tree leaves fall on the same day and how this represents the end of that part of the cycle/end of the season i guess coinciding with the end of their relationship
ty for reading!! i wrote most of this on 4/20/21 because i could not wait to talk about it... and then i edited it a lot in the time since then but i was too lazy to update the quotations here LOL.